It’s cold and blustery this morning, winter winds howling through the trees and sending us scurrying for flannels and slippers the moment we wake up. Boeuf Bourguignon and Chicken Curry are warming our bones on these frigid days even as they fill our tiny house with wonderful smells and make everything feel cosy and homey.

I’m so happy to be home. So happy. I’ve been here a full week after spending 27 days in the hospital while a team of doctors tested and consulted, trying to figure out what was making me so sick. 12 days ago they gathered solemnly around my bed to let me know that they believed I had something incurable, untreatable, and that I would be in the hospital indefinitely. I was devastated, scared, and so sad.

But that wasn’t to be the end of my story.

The next day my friend Farina came to spend the day with me and advocated for me fiercely. Within a few hours, a visiting neurologist who specializes in seizures agreed to see me. After a series of tests, he explained that I did not have the incurable, untreatable, stuck-in-hospital indefinitely thing. Instead, I had a severe virus that had attacked my neurological system causing seizures and all sorts of mayhem, but he had every confidence that with rest, patience, and continued care through an out-patient clinic, I would recover fully.

By the end of the day, we had an accurate diagnosis, a treatment plan in place, and within 5 days I was home again, recovering in the place I love best with my Bear, our animals, and most restorative views of trees, fields, and gardens.

Recovery is slow but steady, and we’re celebrating every little bit of progress, from being able to walk unaided and driving again, to going grocery shopping for the first time and getting to pick out all my favourite things I missed while in hospital.

It’s been a big lifestyle shift for me in so many ways. I know I will get back to full health and strength, but in the meantime, I’m learning to ask for and receive help, embrace consistent self-care routines that support my healing, and learn contentment and happiness in a much slower way of life. Bear is steadfast support to me, making meals, feeding animals, accompanying me on walks to rebuild my strength and endurance. I’m so grateful for him.

I’m also deeply grateful for the support and care of the dear folks who have visited, called, texted, brought food, flowers, and books, and showered us with love and care. My friend Molly set up a GoFundMe account, and I cried and laughed and cried again, so thankful for the kindness and thoughtfulness that enables me to truly rest and recover while our bills are paid for, animals fed, and fridge filled. Thank you. XOXO

The wind is really picking up now, howling around the eaves. Fezzik is curled up on the floor, toddling over often to check on me and get a scratch and a cuddle. It’s time for a bowl of hot curry, a cup of tea, and maybe an old movie to make us laugh. xo