Good morning, luvs! I’m sitting cozy in my big, plaid armchair sipping cinnamon tea and nibbling on crisp, Cameo apple slices. It’s a good way to start a new day.
My eyes feel like dried up salty peas from all the crying I’ve done the last few days. It’s been one of those weeks when painful bits from my past came rushing back in to torment me all over again, trying to tear me down, crush my spirit and make me think I don’t matter much after all. I admit it knocked me down for a while and I felt wretchedly sad, lonely, and unlovable, but then I took a (shaky) deep breath, wiped my tears away and started thinking on good, true things:
- I am not alone.
- I am dearly loved.
- I do matter.
Life is truly beastly sometimes, and thankfully we’re allowed to be a bit of a puddle, to have our weeps and fears and shaky moments, and to withdraw for a while to get that badly needed sleep or just sit quietly with a cup of tea. Then, when we’re ready, we can be brave again, strong enough to see that we really are OK, that life has glorious moments even in the midst of pain, loss, and fear.
I had planned to write a different sort of post for you this morning, but my blogging friend Heather inspired me with her oh-so-real post yesterday. Every day she gathers beauty from around the web to share with her readers, real beauty. But when life handed her pain and heartache she had to share that too, real life. Her words (and courage!) reminded me of my commitment to myself to always be real here.
I was sitting at my desk yesterday when a Mumford & Sons song came on. How I loved these lines:
“And there will come a time, you’ll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.
Get over your hill and see what you find there,
With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair.”
Mumford & Sons
I don’t know what your life is like today, whether things are beautiful, free and happy, or if you too are feeling attacked on all sides. But I hope for patience, courage and peace for you, that you’ll experience love that dismisses your fears, and strength to keep going forward with grace in your heart and, if you’re a bit crazy like me, flowers in your hair.
You’re in a different place now. A stronger place. Wipe your tears, Tart ๐
Yes ma’am, Tracy! ๐ Tears dried, smile happily in place, it’s a new day and a GOOD one! ๐
So sorry that you are having a difficult time, I hope you find and inner strength to help you cope.
We could all stand to be a bit more crazy if it means flowers in our hair. ๐ This is a lovely post (and a lovely blog!), and I hope your weekend will be over the hill.
Thank you, Lindy Lou. ๐ A good sleep and a lovely breakfast are making this a much better day. ๐
Thank you, dear Bethany. ๐ Just talking about the hard stuff makes it easier to bear somehow. ๐
WoW! Krista this is beautiful.. You are full of beauty and grace! Thank you for your kind words but also for your honesty, your courage, your love, your peace and the grace you have given yourself to take time to process the pain instead of shoving it under the rug. These words are treasures. I know as women its so easy for us to put other’s needs before our own so I believe it is true grace, humility and honor when we take time to cry, to ponder, to drink tea and journal to grow closer to our own hearts.
Thanks for sharing your journey! Can’t wait to hear more!
Hugs to you!
Oh babe i want you to know for sure that you are not ever alone and you are extremely loved. You are so strong and I know you’ll continue to fight through this.
Dear Heather, thank you for your encouragement and support. It means so much to me. ๐ I love your reminder that we need to take care of our own hearts in addition to anyone else’s. ๐
Thank you SO much, dear Joanne. Your words are like getting the biggest hug. ๐
Love the honesty you share in these simple words Krista.
I am not alone, I am dearly loved & I do matter.
Isn’t it just so weird that we all forget that when a memory can bring us to our knees?
Glad your standing tall again ๐
Thank you for sharing this post on Journey to Grace…LOVE it, Krista. Thank you for being vulnerable and real. Love to you…
I hate forgetting the things that make me strong, Anna. ๐ Thankfully I’m learning to remember them more quickly!! Thank you for your kindness. ๐
You’re welcome, Hillary. I’m so glad you like it. ๐ Much love to you as well!
Yes, you DO matter…we all do. I’m so pleased you worked your way through your tears. That last photo is so very peaceful.
Sweetheart, we all need a good cry and a good chat with friends every now and then. We have gone through a horrendous 5 or 6 years and somehow managed to get through it all (I won’t mention what for no one would believe it). I have also found that writing about it on my blog has really helped me focus and think it all through, usually coming out a bit more positive at the other end. Have a cry then shake it off and find the good stuff in all the bad. xoxo
Beautiful sunset, Krista! I have been to Germany many times and your posts have reminded me how beautiful the country is.
I am not sure where the tears and heartache are coming from, as a fairly new reader… but, we all go through depths of heart ache in life. It is just difficult to offer you some support without knowing the basis of your pain. In any case, it is a new day, as you have said. Breath it in.
๐
Valerie
another beautiful place girl! your never alone girl!!!!
Have a great week up ahead!
jen @ http://www.passion4food.ca
even though you were expressing your sadness, I really loved this post, so open, honest, raw and truly refreshing. I’m glad you’re starting to feel better, and so sorry that you’ve been feeling so sad!
A beautiful post! I hope that you are feeling better now.
Love such landscapes!
Cheers,
Rosa
Hope you’re feeling much better, Krista! We all have our days where we feel down, but by acknowledging and expressing your emotions you were able to find strength and see the light at the end of the tunnel. There can be no happiness without sadness, and vice versa. Wishing you a wonderful day that’s filled with good thoughts, good company, and good food. And you do matter!
I love Mumford & Sons! Hope you are in a happier place now. ๐